My 8th Guest post of High School Advice comes to us
from Jacinda Buchmann, author of Indigo Incite.
I think her post is fabulous, what do you think?
When Cassandra said that she was a teacher and was looking for
guest posts about high school, I jumped on the opportunity. I was a teacher and
then a full-time school counselor for several years before I became an author.
Now I have the best of both worlds. Starting this school year, I will be a
school counselor two days per week, and the rest of the time I will be able to
write. I'm currently working on the second book in a trilogy :-)
So, the big question: What would I have done differently in high school?
I've always been a practical person and thought that I never gave in to peer
pressure. I never smoke, drank, or did drugs because I thought it was dumb.
(Still think it's dumb by the way, LOL). I lived in a very small town, my
graduating class had only 96 students, and in a small town there isn't a lot to
do. Kids were either in sports, working on their parents' farm, or speed dating
as many students as possible. Like any high school, anywhere, there were
"the groups": "The Jocks", "The Cheerleaders",
"The Drama Club", "The Stoners". I could go on, but I have
a feeling you know exactly what I'm talking about. Given the physical location
of where you live, the groups might be a little different. I grew up in
Montana, so ethnicity and race wasn't really an issue as far as
"groups" were concerned. There were Caucasian students and a handful
of Native Americans, but that was basically it. In the schools around my area
now, in Arizona, there is an equal toss up of Caucasian and Hispanic students,
and I often see that race and ethnicity because a big issue as far as grouping
goes. In the elementary schools I see the Hispanic students team up against the
Caucasian students to play soccer at recess.
In middle school and high school I see the same type of racial
separation at the lunch tables. My question is, why? Why do people (of any age) feel the need to
belong to a certain group? Is it right to want to belong to a certain group? Is
it wrong? They are difficult questions, but the real answer is Yes and No.
Let me go back to the original question and I'll explain. What
would I have done differently in high school? I said that I thought I never gave in to peer
pressure, but is that really possible? To never
give in to pressure? I don't think that's realistic and in thinking about it
further, I realized that I did give in to pressure. In high school, I didn't
associate myself with any particular group.
I certainly wasn't an athlete, wasn't in drama, didn't do drugs, wasn't
considered a "nerd", I was just me. I got along with everyone in
school, I was friends with people who I had things in common with, but outside
of school I only hung out with a couple of friends. Because again, there was
that whole, not giving in to peer pressure thing. I didn't like sports, so I
wasn't going to go to a game just because that was the thing to do. I didn't
drink so I didn't go to parties because that was the thing to do. I was just
happy hanging out with my small group of friends, and I actually liked spending
time with my family. So, what was the problem? What could I have possibly done
differently?
I thought about that as I sat down to write this post, and the
answer became glaringly clear. I DIDN'T go out of my way to befriend the kids
who didn't have friends, the kids who didn't fit into a particular group or
were considered "nerds" and laughed at by others. Why not? Probably
because I was worried what other people would think of me. Would I be
considered a "nerd" if I talked to them? Looking back now I think,
"What the heck was wrong with me?" I was NEVER mean to anyone, but
what excuse is there to sit quietly back and observe people who don't have
friends, people who get laughed at by others, and do nothing? Would it have
been that difficult to go out of my way to say, "Hi, it looks like you're
sitting alone at lunch today, would you like to sit and have lunch with
me?" Wow, that's a huge thought. So yeah, if I could go back and do things
differently, I would have been a lot friendlier and welcoming to others. It
makes me sad now to even think that I could have made a difference in someone's
life simply by going out of my way to say "hi". For someone who
doesn't feel like they fit in or have friends, a simple "hi" from
someone, or a "would you like to sit and have lunch with me" goes a
long way to make a difference in someone's day. A "hi" doesn't mean
that you're suddenly going to be best friends, or that you "like"
someone. It's simply showing that you're a decent person and care about others.
So back to the second question. Is it right or wrong to belong to
a certain group? It's human nature to want to belong. Everyone wants to feel
that they fit in somewhere in the world. It becomes wrong when we try to fit in
somewhere where we don't belong. To try to be someone who we're not. And it's
especially wrong to believe that you have to fit into one particular group and
exclude all others. A sign of maturing and having a high self-esteem is
recognizing that you can be friends and hang out with whoever you want. If a
person is nice, if a person has something in common with you, then be nice
back. It's okay to be friends with a wide group of people, regardless of their
interests and regardless of their skin color.
When I wrote INDIGO INCITE, I created characters with a wide range
of backgrounds and ethnicities. Though there are some Caucasian characters,
there is also a main character who is half Native American half Mexican, a
Chinese girl, and a mixed race African American girl. Oh, and perhaps my
favorite, a young autistic boy. Is the story about race and ethnicity?
Absolutely not. Does it ever become a topic or an issue? Nope. It's just a
great action/adventure with a touch of fantasy and romance with characters who
happen to be from different backgrounds who all become friends. It is my hope
that, given time, more YA books will begin to show characters with a variety of
backgrounds because isn't that who we all are? We're all different. We all come
from different backgrounds, and it's about time that society begins to accept
the fact that that's okay. Half of that begins with media and literature
demonstrating that it's okay, but it also starts with you. Everyone can make a
difference by setting a positive example.
About the Author: Jacinda Buchmann lives in Arizona with her
husband and three children. She graduated from Carroll College, in Helena,
Montana, with a B.A. in elementary education and later received a Master’s
degree from Northern Arizona University, in school counseling. After spending
several years as a teacher and later a school counselor, she now spends her
time writing, any free chance she can get, that is, when she’s not spending
time with her family or creating a new concoction in the kitchen.
Connect with Jacinda:
Goodreads blurb: There are no secrets
Sixteen-year-old Tyler believed that his extra-sensory powers were a secret, but when his twin brother, Toby, is kidnapped by a covert government agency, he realizes that he has no secrets, and he has nowhere to hide.
He’s not alone
Now, in order to save himself and rescue his brother, Tyler must call upon the help of four strangers. Unknown to each other, Eddie, Liliana, Grace, and Sarah share a common bond. They are Indigo Children. With extra-sensory powers of their own, they must unite with Tyler in order to maintain their freedom.
Unexpected romance
They’re on the run. They’re on a mission. Romance is a distraction that Tyler can’t afford. But sometimes, the heart has a mind of its own.
Time is running out
Will they find Toby before the agency finds them first? Find out in Indigo Incite, Book One of the Indigo Trilogy.
Interested in reading?
~ Amazon
~ AmazonUK
~ Smashwords ~ B&N
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